.. ~ /1,,,.,f) r ] 1 R SCOTT P K PAGE BRUCE RUDDICK I)ATRICK ANDERSON NEUFVILLg- JULY 1942 ;fl~ AGONY COLUMN Granted our daily !)a.rdon by the clock We checked the paper hunger of machines. Took dovm our hats and sought the thronging streets Echoed the elevator boy's "Good-night." And walked home, blind, to bathe our sweating feet, After having dutifully read the news, The daily and the weekly histories-The price of silk and steel, men and prunes-We learned (Ah Wonder!) that Padukah's Zoo Has bred a baby python on tomato juice. We listened, faithful, to the lyric casts Reel out the serial lives thro~gh glycerine tears; The funnymen castrate themselves for laughs;Suggestions for the blackout and the blightDescending on intestine and on pate. Consulted British Israelites' decree, Nostradamus~-other certainties. Put out the light and democratically Consigned our vote, by proxy, to the Lord; Followed explosive sign posts of a dream. Bedclothes, like skin exclude or hold a world. BRUCE RUDDICK VARIATION ON A THEME I • .Enamort have I been of bleaseful Death, Knelled him soft names in manes a muted rhymn; Or, vault-face, trumpeted my herald breath Into Gold Gotha echoes of his fame: The Lord of Ghosts; the Imperor of Bearse; Rex Tumulus; 8reat Sherasod the Prince; Menhir von Wrinklemop; Barrow de Hearse; Le Comte de Funct; von Waggoner, C.G.; Sire Mintz. II. Mr. o. Topsy-Turf, of Cher Noel House; The Mausolem, Sir Koph-Ag, L.A.G.: That Mandarin Chap Suey Seid; the Russ Ne-colei Hell-ytch; Ripper R.I.P.; Sven Swansong: H~rry Carey, Samurai; Nick Ropoulos; Regratter Abie Taff; The Cryptic Patriark; Chief Wenanwei; Allover Cromlech; Rotter Doestenasher, graph. ( III. O I have skald his eili-aces rite, And conjoured him in alles shapes and garbs,As heirold in black ossuary dight,As Abbot ~~re, as Cooped haeming barbs, As Myster Wynken brinken nods; I've seen Hymn in his cere-monies and costumes, yea As houriental djinn, of yestern mien, As mielancholy Dane, and aye as Francheman gai. IV, His ·gass, his joker-knots, his escapades,His bower, his mite, they monsternate me not. I know his tryx, the way-pence of his trades,He has been sybilled blacker than he wrot. I no not fear him, and it may well be That I aspyre his embrass, would cry: "Ac~in my brooder, comes to call for me, And more than ever, mortal, it seems rich to diet" A. M. KLEIN HOME FRONT "They've come, Pop," Beverley said. MeAllister stood up and yawned, lmcurling his fat arms till they stretched out taut like the short wooden bar of a cross. His head on its side, his large mouth open and his awkward legs turned in at the knees he was like a ridicul&us clumsy doll. . He went to the window and looked out. The long wall of semidetached houses with similar verandahs and stairways and the road, a rigid black moat. Almost in the centre of the pi9ture? a la~ge van was vomiting from its dark interior a pell mell of glistening brittle furniture onto the sidewalk. A short fat man looked complacently at the struggling movers directing their effort and, from time to time, tapping a large black cigar. "That's him, Pop," Beverley pointed his skinny finger at the little man. uHmm, perhaps they'll be all right," McAllister considered. "But they' re French, " Beverle~y widened his eyes in amazement. "How can they be all right?" "Micks too huh?" thought McAllister. He saw the fat man twistinghis fawning body before a silent painted j_dol surrounded by, sharp yellow tongues of candlelight. ":Molly," he shouted, "The new neighbours have come. French pea soups1" His thin hungry looking wife came in from the kitchen. She walked quickly and precisely over to the window. "They shouldn't bother us, Charlie," she said. "Well, I dunnow. " A boy of about sixteen ran down the p~vement, turned abruptly and pointed to the McAllister's window. His father took off his hat and waved. "Quick! Get backt" McAllister's voice was a suddP-n growl. He pulled Beverley down and added, "Th~y 're looking at us~' A month later McAllister came back from the plant. He climbed· · laboriously from his dusty black car and heard a rustle in the great maple tree which shaded the front of his house. He looked up into-the cloud and saw the new boy with narrow sharp eyes and prison croppedhair squatting on a brm.ch and looking down at him. He sm11l.a4 · while McAllister,chis massive head up ended, stared sullenly at him. "Get down out of there," he said. "Go climb your own tree if you want to." "r·,.llke dis tree, mister," the boy answetJed placidly. "It's strung It won't break." "arome on, now. Get down. " "Can' y0 let anyone have no fun, ~1ister? I'm not hurting notin'" "Get down and none of your damn lip, " McAllister cannoned his -•-- large heavy words into the shivering evening air. The boy climbed down disengaging himself reluctantly from the satizy limbs of the maple tree. He walked away slowly--obstinately--while McAllister,his hands on his hips, stared cruelly at him daring him to some sudden evert protest. He reached his doorsteps and, turning, chanted, "Stingy, Stingy. Ya English rriiser." McAllister, sudd1~nly deaf, went into his house. A few weeks later, when the street was furred v-·ith snow, McAllister found a mess of smashed bottles in his yard. "Beverley, u he called. "Molly, get Beverley." His son came running swiftly, his thin excited words r .ushingbefore him." Andre did it. Honest. The whole street knows. He's been collecting those bottles for days. Scouts t honour he has. 1' 0 Why didn't you tell me before," McAllister became firm with rage. His body shook and he moved a hand jerkily and with great difficulty towards the door. "Well, I didn't know," Beverley's tenuous whine twisted into the !t cold air. t, He said he was collecting them for the salvage." "All li:.ght J All right!" his father shou.te-d. With sudden heavy purpose, his vengeance tightening in his body, he stamped towards the telephone." Goddam it. I'll show them, If anybody annoys me, I'll--" He reaaed the phone and called the police.Th~n took out his watch and waited. The radio police arrived in exactly six miuntes, two wood2n men like gigantic penguins who stared at him patiently, awai;ing the usual torrent of complaint • . "Look at this, "McAllister roared pointing at the bottles, "These damn neighbours. They deliberately smashed them in my yard. I suppose they hope we'll out ourselves on them. Go over and tellthem to clean it up. " . Obediently the two uniformed men, their heavy feet in slow rhythmictj_me,walked through the yard, into the alley, throue;h the neighbourts gate and up to the adjoinin6 balcony. McAllister watched them triumphantly. The little fat man, cigar in mouth, came to the door. His bland f ,:i ce assumed an immediate seriousn~~ss when he saw the two policmen. He began talking quickly m d anxiously in French. The policy interjected a few disinterested questions, then turned an9-, in slow procession, returned to a position a few feet in front of McAllister. "He says that ···his boy didn't do j_t," one of them said. "Godl" shouted McAllister. He ran down the st[' irs and up toti e fence • . Seizing the slate grey bo~rds he called up tothe little man, , who, leaning on his §allery railing,regarded him euriously like some. oag~d and raging animal. You know damn well he did it. The whole street knows. Get him down here at once and ma.ke him clean it up." He turned to the police. "Make him do it. Hasn't RnylID dy any rights heFe .?' The little man tapped his cigar ~nd waited. "Go on, make him do it,rr he cried to the police. "We can't do nothing, sir," the spokesman of the pair said. i1 "Well, -et 11 see whBt will be done. "McAllister tried to convey a threat of legal proceedings in his voice. The police shrugged and left. The next day when they heard the neighbour turn on his radio, McAllister reached down and switched on a sputtering arc 13.mp he had got out of storage purposely. The music in the other's radio metamorphosed · into an angry monotonous hiss. McAllister triumphantly nodded at his admiring famj_ly. He repeated this whenever he heard the· other's radio ; whisper through the thin walJ.s • It was quite a minor tr\;·.mph even if it did interfere with their own wirelesf reception. Some weeks later he tried another tack. He brought home a stink producing fluid from the compa.nyts laboratories and, getting an old rusty pipe, he tiptoed out late Rt night and sprayed it over his neighbour's foundations. There wRs no evident reaction but their own readyimaginRtion supplied one. . . ----•· "We'll get them to move out yet, Molly," he said. "Oh don't be too hard on them., " H.er worried bird like faoe softened. "They're really not toobRd. I nod to them when I meet them on the-stre~' "Well, nod :i_f you want to. I won•t. I'll just l ook straight ahead whenever T pRss them, the be_stards." He heard the low sound of p violin j -.~st audible and carefully subdued. "Ah trying to listen," he said, "and slowly, deliciously he reached down tohis arc lamp. Soon the snow melted and the chocolate eRrth-was made-sharp ·w~th• needles _of fresh grass. As if in celebration the -neighbours bought~a deg. It was a small spaniel the colour of weak coffee and for a time it stayed in its own yard, but after a while, it made --:short forays into -. -, other gardens. One day , Molly McAllister found it di5ging among the peonies. Later her husband saw it r acing across hj_s ra.ns~r h;:ids . H-:; '1; 7 _8 k• up a rock to shy at it but caution staJred him. If. the dog wa:s hurt he could be su0d, he thought.He went to see the local chief of :police. "Oh heave a rock at it. Kick him in the ribs." McAllister took about an hour to explain just why he couldn't do this. "Well," said the captain settlir.g his firm body in its